Jarrod was confident that the impending lawsuit was absolutely no problem. After all, the officer was a diehard Cubs fan who would surely defend the young star's point of view. That whiny little girl did not have a case.
"The Phenom" smirked as he strutted confidently to the Smokies' clubhouse for a meeting with his attorney. This was another point in his favor; the lawyer, Marty "Hung Jury" Mahoney, was the greatest lawyer this side of Johnnie Cochran. Mahoney had never lost a case; paying off the judges helped considerably.
"So, Marty, are we ready to give this woman the shaft?" asked Jarrod anxiously.
"Yeah, Rod, I've even got some fake drug tests she failed, proving she was obviously incapable of driving a car," answered "Hung Jury." "But there's something else I want to talk to you about. What's this in the News-Sentinel today? John Adams called you a man who gives the impression of one who parks in handicapped spaces and kicks old peoples' canes."
"Oh,please," snarled Rod. "Adams is an idiot. He doesn't know what he's talking about. Why just today, a bum asked me for some money, and I actually gave him something."
"What's that?" asked Mahoney curiously.
"The finger!" Jarrod exploded into laughter.
Mahoney shook his head sadly. "Listen, kid, you've got to lose the attitude. I can't keep bailing you out if you're going to piss off all of East Tennessee."
"Come on, Marty," pleaded Jarrod, " that guy was a loser. People around here need to remember who I am."
Mahoney's shoulders drooped in defeat. "All right, buddy. I'll see you in court."
Jarrod was almost giddy. He went home and played with some software he bought from this weird-looking guy and then slugged two homeruns in a 7-3 Smokies' win that night; he was booed at every at-bat.